Happy Now

I guess I drew the short straw and had to take a job in Atlanta on short notice and work through Presidents Day. But now I think it is likely that I will start my 2 month project next Monday, after just finishing the extension of the Atlanta project this Friday... I guess it is better than being in a position where I am not needed for any work. I need to slow it down a bit I think, just because a project manager allocated 40 hours for 80 hours of work, does not mean I have to somehow magically get the project done in that time window. Also I need to disassociate my value and abilities and talent from the functioning state of the software I work with. I didn't write it or make claims about what it could do. I have tried to focus on presenting a positive and reassuring message to the project manager and to the clients, it is my coworkers that see me stressed and frustrated.

I am trying to not postpone being happy, it is easy to say "when this is done" I can relax. I have got to relax regardless of what is not done or what job I have to do, because if I don't, then I may never relax. It seems in life their is always something to do, some task to complete, some monkey on your back. I thought for a long time that graduating college was the end of a long, painful, expensive road and the beginning of my life of ease. I think I wasted college looking forward to the end of it, graduating, rather than taking time to enjoy what I could while I was there. So I could just look forward to the end of this 2 month project, but instead I will relax and be happy now and each day of the project until it finishes or ends. It is good to finish what you start but also good to enjoy the journey along the way.