Second Tuesday weight-in

232.0 lb

Loss of 1.0 lb from last week. Net loss for two weeks 4.5 lb. I plan to lose at least 10 more pounds by Jan 6th, 2009.

I didn't expect to lose 3.5 lb again, but I admit I was hoping for at least 1.5 lb. The next week will be the most challenging for food temptations yet as their are back to back parties from Wednesday through Sunday. But my goal remains at 2 lb per week and this coming week is no different in that respect.

What strikes me is that, in looking back, I see that I fell into a trap of waiting to start, waiting for everything else to fall into place so I could just start. I was fooling myself the whole time and ended up at 236.5 lb before I finally dropped the excuses and made the decision to do it. I just don't think I will ever be in a situation where exercise and eating healthy will be more or less easy (or convenient) than it already is. My bad habits are hard to break no matter when I try to break them, and good habits are hard for me to make no matter when I try to make them. Sure some periods of my life have had additional challenges that make exercise more difficult, but it has never been 100% effortless to plan and do it. I could have waited until I was back at 300 lb to start, I guess it is a good thing I threw out my size 42 pants. It was my tight clothes that gave me a desire to change more than anything else; I have some perfectly good 34 waist jeans and I wanted to fit in them again.

Exercise Strategy

I missed the workout on Saturday because I stayed up late Friday playing games. Rebecca had fresh professional quality waffles when I woke up as well, reducing my desire to hit the gym to zero. I thought at the time I would go later, but it didn't happen.

My exercise strategy has a lot to do with sleep, i.e. what time I go to bed. I workout in the mornings on an empty stomach (well lots of water but no food). My goal is 20 minutes of cardio, six days a week. I then eat the largest meal of the day within an hour after working out. Not to say I go overboard at breakfast (700 calories), but the rest of the day, my meals are fewer calories. Exercising six days a week is important for me because more than one or two consecutive rest days can derail my routine. Once I start working out I have more energy and time. However, the chance to sleep in and avoid exercise becomes more of a temptation. So with that here are some typical events or items that can derail (and have derailed) fitness goals

• travel
• illness
• vacations or holidays
  

These items can cause me to miss workouts or indulge in food. The best way for me to handle the above is to have a plan. If I have a plan for how I can continue exercise while traveling, then I am more likely to stick to it. If I have a plan for how to prevent illness, then I can likely avoid it. So I need to plan better what I will eat and how I will exercise in different situations so that I can be as flexible and do as much of what I enjoy as possible while still keeping on track with my goals.

That being said, I firmly believe the following:
"The key to getting what you want most is found in giving up some of what you desire less."

So the reason I don't already have what I want is because I have something else. What I already have is preventing me from obtaining what I want even more and I won't let it go.

So I can't have it all, I can't stay up until 1:00am every night and expect to wake up at 5:00am to exercise. I can't exercise on reduced sleep and then eat chips, candy and other junk and expect my body to repair itself. I might be technically "able" to make these choices, but it is not an ideal scenario and will not help me reach my goals.

I can't binge on food at parties and avoid the effects of that. I know what the ideal scenario is for losing weight and it is largely in my power to control: my portions, how late I remain awake at night, and if I get up to exercise.

Coolest thing for bloggers today

Go here

and put in your blog url.

It will analyze your blog and determine your blog's Meyers Briggs personality type.

Pretty neat I think.

When I take the test I am INTL, but the site gave this blog ESTP! I guess blogging lets me get out of my shell. Or my blog is nothing like my personality...

Save this SQL query

The following query took 28 years to return.

SELECT firstname
FROM all_humanity
WHERE
gender = 'female'
ORDER BY beauty, wisdom

Query returned 53,228,183,834 rows
Rebecca
Mary
Eve
...

But the wait was worth it because I married the first row returned.

Food strategy

So I got a plate of cookies from our home teachers Sunday, after they left, I said in my head, "The difference between reaching my goal and obtaining my desired reward is NOT eating ONE cookie right now."

The reason for this is: once I eat one, then two is not a big deal, and eventually I am trying mix up some dough and frosting to make some more because mine taste a thousand times better and I am still hungry. I just don't have the off switch when junk food is around. I can eat and eat and eat and never be done. This is how I am with food, but you may be different. If only I could be hypnotized into believing chocolate and pastries tasted like circus peanuts.

I have a preset time of the week when I can splurge a little and eat things that are not normally part of my day, by doing this I don't waste calories on junk that isn't worth eating. I plan ahead for the best quality indulgences. For example: although a Hostess powdered or chocolate dipped donut may taste good, some handmade pecan cinnamon rolls fresh from the oven are that much better. I also run a calorie deficit during the week so that if I get a little crazy one day, the deficit makes it have less of an impact on me overall.

First Tuesday weigh-in

233.0 lb

A loss 3.5 lb from last week Tuesday.

Thanks for the harassment encouragement everyone.

This past week has been great! I feel more energetic and have accomplished a lot of tasks I have been putting off. I don't expect to lose 3.5 lb next week, but my goal is continual consistent reduction in weight through the loss of fat (preserving muscle as much as possible).

Getting to the bottom of a BSOD

Rebecca's computer has started throwing BSOD recently. Blue screen of death (BSOD) errors have caused many people to throw up their hands in disgust at Windows countless thousands of times. Industries are built around fixing computers with BSOD. Fortunately, I worked front line technical support for several years and know a thing or two about these. Although, format and reinstalling windows is going to most likely fix the issue, it is akin to cutting off a persons leg for an ingrown toenail. Struggling to fix problems without reformatting and reinstalling has resulted in gaining more insight into the internals of the Windows OS and software in general.

So I could boot into safe mode with F8 while the computer started but, each time I tried to boot into normal mode, I would get BSOD and reboot. In safe mode you can go to control panel | system | Advanced | startup & recovery | settings and uncheck the box for Automatically Restart. This will allow you to read the BSOD message which was necessary for me to troubleshoot the problem. You see, unlike some people, computers will usually tell you what is wrong them and furthermore it is usually possible for you to fix computer problems.

The error message was 0x0000007e 0xc0000005 ... so really useful to a geek who can read hex and memorize windows kernel error codes. Each time a Windows XP computer BSOD crashes, a message gets put in the System Log, also you will get (unless you configured differently) a timestamped MiniDump binary file .dmp in Windows/Minidump folder.

The minidump file created from the BSOD is key to really getting at the root cause of the problem. But it is not really human readable (it can partially be read in a text editor but lots of binary data makes it laborious.) So you have to have windows debugging tools to extract the information from the file out to get to the bottom of the problem. http://www.microsoft.com/whdc/devtools/debugging/default.mspx Well, both Windows symbols and Debugging Tools to be precise. Without symbols the .dmp file will not reveal all its secrets.

To start I moved all unsigned drivers out of system32/drivers folder into a tmp folder called system32/drivers.unsigned

You can identify the unsigned drivers with a tool in safe mode called sigverif, just pick advanced and point the search to system32/drivers folder to get a list of unsigned drivers.

Then open an explorer window and move these files out of drivers and into drivers.unsigned.

Restart and you should be back in business and able to boot in windows normally, but some hardware or software will not work right until you figure out which one of your unsigned drivers is sick. This is where the .dmp files will zero in on what driver is to blame, the rest of the unsigned drivers are innocent bystanders to this one bad apple.

The culprit, vsdatant.sys, which using process explorer, is a file installed on Rebecca's system by Zone Alarm.


Microsoft (R) Windows Debugger Version 6.9.0003.113 X86
Copyright (c) Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.


Loading Dump File [C:\WINDOWS\Minidump\Mini111508-03.dmp]
Mini Kernel Dump File: Only registers and stack trace are available

Symbol search path is: C:\WINDOWS\Symbols
Executable search path is:
Unable to load image ntoskrnl.exe, Win32 error 0n2
*** WARNING: Unable to verify timestamp for ntoskrnl.exe
Windows XP Kernel Version 2600 (Service Pack 3) UP Free x86 compatible
Product: WinNt, suite: TerminalServer SingleUserTS Personal
Kernel base = 0x804d7000 PsLoadedModuleList = 0x80554040
Debug session time: Sat Nov 15 05:55:48.000 2008 (GMT-7)
System Uptime: 0 days 0:00:33.562
Unable to load image ntoskrnl.exe, Win32 error 0n2
*** WARNING: Unable to verify timestamp for ntoskrnl.exe
Loading Kernel Symbols
...............................................................................................................................
Loading User Symbols
Loading unloaded module list
..
Unable to load image tcpip.sys, Win32 error 0n2
*** WARNING: Unable to verify timestamp for tcpip.sys
ERROR: FindPlugIns 8007007b
*******************************************************************************
* *
* Bugcheck Analysis *
* *
*******************************************************************************

Use !analyze -v to get detailed debugging information.

BugCheck 1000007E, {c000001d, 89d6a024, ba597978, ba597674}

Unable to load image vsdatant.sys, Win32 error 0n2
*** WARNING: Unable to verify timestamp for vsdatant.sys
*** ERROR: Module load completed but symbols could not be loaded for vsdatant.sys
Probably caused by : vsdatant.sys ( vsdatant+450c1 )

Followup: MachineOwner
---------

What is still strange to me is I did not remove this driver from the system32/drivers folder. Here is a list of the drivers I removed from the folder:
11/15/2008 10:07 AM dir .
11/15/2008 10:07 AM dir ..
10/04/2006 07:42 PM 2,432 cdr4_xp.sys
10/04/2006 07:42 PM 2,560 cdralw2k.sys
11/18/2002 02:51 PM 377,358 cmaudio.sys
03/03/2008 05:25 PM 1,405,632 cmudax3.sys
11/11/2003 10:44 AM 333,600 ctdvda2k.sys
09/02/2003 11:25 AM 11,266 diag69xp.sys
01/31/2008 04:18 PM 9,216 FlashSys.sys
11/23/2002 07:36 PM 16,016 hpoipr07.sys
09/10/2003 11:36 PM 21,060 iviaspi.sys
09/17/2003 03:57 PM 8,440 LANPkt.sys
01/14/2008 01:15 PM 15,340 ndisrd.sys
09/19/2003 01:47 AM 10,368 pfc.sys
10/10/2006 02:06 PM 17,136 SSLDrv.sys
12/18/2004 07:32 PM 38,229 StMp3Rec.sys
08/07/2006 03:42 PM 20 SymRedir.cat
08/07/2006 03:42 PM 1,133 SymRedir.inf
07/10/2008 08:35 AM 32,000 usbaapl.sys
17 File(s) 2,301,806 bytes

So I still may have to add them back to system32/drivers, a few at a time, to see if I can zero in on the driver in the above list that caused the issue.

Update: Well, from the above list I narrowed it down to:
01/31/2008 04:18 PM 9,216 FlashSys.sys
All other files did not cause a BSOD when put back in system32/drivers folder.
I am not sure how to identify the source software that put FlashSys.sys into my drivers folder, but I suspect my SanDisk Cruzer Titanium USB 2 GB thumbdrive as the culprit.

Update 11/17/2008:
Well I again got a BSOD, so I removed all but
11/18/2002 02:51 PM 377,358 cmaudio.sys
03/03/2008 05:25 PM 1,405,632 cmudax3.sys
Which I need for sound and I am back in business again, but I am not sure which of the other files besides:
01/31/2008 04:18 PM 9,216 FlashSys.sys
is also causing BSOD on the system. I will probably need to find a way to track down the source software programs for each of these drivers.

My health goals for the rest of 2008

I gained some weight over the summer and it is time to take it back off before the suits get replaced with sweats.

My stats today are a dismal and depressing:
236.5 lbs
32% body fat

Pretty horrendous, nearly a 1/3 of my body, over 70 lbs, is gelatinous fat. I have 8 weeks until January and so I plan to lose approximately 2 lbs per week to reach my goals of:
222 lbs
29% body fat

How I will achieve this is by:

• getting to bed by 9:30 PM
• drinking at least 64 oz water each day
  
• waking up and hitting the gym or stationary bike for 20 minute cardio 6 days a week
  
• weighing in every Tuesday, Nov 18th, Nov 25th, Dec 2nd, Dec 9th, Dec 16th, Dec 23rd, Dec 30th, and Jan 6th
  
• tracking daily nutrition and calories on an account at live strong
• leaning on a very supportive wife for encouragement and discipline

This is going to be a challenge for me because we are, after all, in the midst of "The Holidays" where food is consumed in greater quantities, diets often forgotten, and exercise abandoned on icy cold mornings. But I want to be in the kind of shape where I can go mountain biking in 2009 again and fit comfortably in my 2007 clothes. I am prepared to make choices now to get there. I hope you have some goals you are working toward as well, and I wish you success on attaining them.

Happy Birthday Rebecca!

1. You are kind to others, even those who are unkind or thoughtless and insensitive to you.
2. You have a good attitude. You made the best of a bad date with me without whining or complaining, and after that I was hooked.
3. You know the value of hard work and sacrifice, you set goals and practice delayed gratification.
4. You laugh and find happiness and enjoy each day, I love making you laugh and turn red.
5. You have a cool and funny family. I miss hanging out with them, especially Nathan and his family. Your dad is a riot and his wife is caring, funny and a talented cook. They both made me feel at home visiting them in Dallas.
   
6. Your sister is a great friend to me and I love to play games with her.
   
7. You got a great Texan smile and your eyes are beautiful as well.
8. You love to visit with my family and are so nice to them.
   
9. You let me go and play games until 2:00am with my friends.
10. Life just keeps getting better the more we are together.
11. You have a great voice.
12. You are a great chef.
13. You do so much to support our family.
14. You are a loving nurturing mother.
15. You are my eternal girlfriend.
16. You have a green thumb.
17. You are a superb driver.
18. You workout at the gym and don't make excuses.
19. You are organized and efficient.
20. Your home is always clean and well maintained.
21. You are creative and have an eye for design.

You're all this and more and your mine all mine.

Gratitude

The above was Rebecca's favorite line from the movie Juno. It is so very true.
My life used to be divided like this:
time in school/time not in school

Later on it was:
time at work/time at home

Then it seemed to become:
time when single/time when married

Now it is more like:
time before kids/time after kids

I need to be better at enjoying the last nine months before he gets here. I have focused a lot on the inconveniences and sacrifices and suckiness of pregnancy and have probably missed out on appreciating some beautiful moments. I really don't feel I can be grateful enough to my Heavenly Father for sending me my two beautiful angels, Rebecca and Eleanor. I love 'em.